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Maturity is when you don’t force people to choose you

Maturity is when you don’t force people to choose you. Maturity is when you’ve accepted that such is life, and that not everything will go accordingly to your plan, and not everyone/everything you love will love you right back.

I used to be besotted with this one guy a long time ago, and when things turned sour between us and we no longer speak, I would kick and scream, repeating the question of “why” over and over again to my friends and family (much to their annoyance and dismay).

I just couldn’t comprehend why things fell apart, and why I wasn’t the one he chose in the end. Admittedly, I used to desperately cling onto any opportunity I could get just to “accidentally” bump into him, just for a sliver of hope that we’ll have a second alone and I could spill to him the ocean of things I’ve buried within me for the entirety of our complicated relationship.

I wanted to tell him that he’s made me feel an inexplicable way no one has ever been able to bring out of me before. I wanted to tell him that my body felt like it has been lit up by fire and sparks every single time his hands are on any part of my body. I wanted to tell him that I’ve shed countless nights of tears over him when we ceased contact.

I wanted to tell him to give me a chance, just a solid, honest chance and that we’ll work out and live happily ever after, despite all the realistic obstacles that deemed us incompatible from the start.

I’m thankful that I never had that opportunity.

Why are we out here begging people for love and attention (bare minimum, by the way). Why are we out here lapping out breadcrumbs? (girl, stand the fk up).

Upon much reflection, I thought to myself: how gross it is that I’m really out here trying to force someone to love me back? It’s actually really creepy if you really think about it.

Why are we encroaching on someone’s right of choice, swaying them into decisions and choices that they’re uncomfortable in making and pressuring them to conform to our ideals?

No one owes us anything. Not everyone HAS to love us back, and we don’t have the right to demand it either.

Maturing is releasing that people don’t owe us our idealized life that we dreamed up in our head, and maturing is releasing that we don’t want that kind of connection/people in our lives anyway, not if we have to force and convince them in the first place.

Source: written by Cher

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